Don’t you want to go to school? Or maybe you just want to spend the day at home? Here are some ways on how to pretend illness and avoid leaving home.
Here are 12 smart ways how not to go to school?
- You can pretend dizziness or weakness.
- Start pretending illness at night or early in the morning around 5:00.
- Don’t brush your teeth and Go to bed early.
- Get ready to measure the temperature.
- Wake up in the middle of the night.
- Do not sleep until late at night.
- Increase the symptoms of your imaginary disease in the morning.
- Protest if your parents want to leave you at home.
- Show signs of improvement in your health.
1. Start pretending at night or early in the morning around 5:00.
If you plan to stay home the next day, let your mom or dad know you are not feeling well at night. But be careful, some diseases, such as stomach ache, usually go on during the night. Therefore, it is not always necessary to pretend at night. Sometimes a lie may fail and you will eventually have to go to school.
- Infection. If you’ve ever had a bacterial or viral infection before, you can repeat the symptoms of the disease. It will be more real. If you met someone who wasn’t feeling well and had chills, you can feign the same symptoms. Parents will think that you are infected.
- Stomach problems. Don’t eat too much at dinner. If your parents ask if something is wrong, answer that you have a stomach ache. Make sure you have hidden snacks in the room so that you can skip the meal because “you don’t feel well”. Your parents will immediately think you are sick. Get on with your homework. Tilt your head every now and then and keep your head down, your parents will notice that you don’t feel well and the pain will not let you function normally.
- Sore throat. This will only work if your parents are not oversensitive. If you have over-protective parents, they can immediately send you to a doctor and the lie will come out. Do not try such tricks in this case. The day before your planned illness, tell your parents that you have a scratching throat. In the evening between 19:45 and 20:00 tell them that you are very tired and you have a headache.
- Chills and flu. Breathe through your mouth as if your nose is blocked. In the presence of parents, try to speak through the nose. If you are in a room other than your parents and they ask you something, answer them lightly hold your nose. Put on several layers of clothing, it will look like you have chills. Patients often have chills. Sneeze loudly and blow your nose in front of your parents. Do this not only when they are next door, but also so that they can hear you in the next room. When the parents are not looking, rub your eyes and forehead. Thanks to this your face will be warm and red. You can also direct a stream of the dryer on your face. Then approach your parents and say that you feel like you have a fever.
2. Don’t brush your teeth and Go to bed early.
Do not say anything. When you sit in the room with your parents, just get up, go to yourself and lie down. Don’t brush your teeth – they’ll probably come to you to remind you.
They will then begin to wonder if you are well and whether you feel well. You can tell them that you don’t feel well. Describe your “symptoms”, show that you are impatient and in a bad mood, and then willingly go to sleep. Do not show anger if your parents want to send you to school sick or not.
3. Get ready to measure the temperature.
If you do all the previous steps well, your parents will probably want to measure your temperature. Before measuring, say that you must go to the toilet. Make sure there is a cup in the bathroom and pour hot water into it. Rinse your mouth with it, especially under the tongue. However, before you unscrew the sink, drain the toilet water. Thanks to this, parents will not hear you pour water and rinse your mouth. Note: This method works only if the parents measure the temperature under the tongue.
4. Wake up in the middle of the night.
If you are pretending to be having stomach problems, wake up your parents at 1 am and say you have just vomited. You can also shed a few tears, it will only convince your parents that you are telling the truth. If you are pretending to be flu or a sore throat, start coughing so loudly to wake them up. When you hear them coming to you, rub your face vigorously until it is red.
5. Do not sleep until late at night.
This will make unsightly bags appear under your eyes, and you will have good reasons to have a day off. Make sure you can get enough sleep during the day. However, if you do not plan to sleep during the day, here’s what you should do: go to sleep an hour later than you usually do. Small bags will appear under your eyes or they will be slightly puffy. Try to sleep at least 4 hours and wake up an hour earlier than usual. Put a little blush on your fingertip – you’ll find it in your mom’s cosmetics. Grab a blue eye shadow and mix a little with a blush. Gently apply everything under the eyes. Rub it well, but make it noticeable.
6. Increase the symptoms of your imaginary disease in the morning.
Especially reluctantly and slowly get out of bed. If your parents continue to insist on going to school, get up, but don’t get up too soon. Dress slowly but not too slowly. Skip the button in the shirt, you study carelessly and do not tie your shoes. Choose and prepare your breakfast as if you had no appetite. If you want to pretend to have a cough, go to the bathroom and rub your eyes with water, they will look tired. If you didn’t start pretending at night, it will be much harder to convince your parents that you are sick.
7. If you are pretending to be sick at the last minute, a few simple tricks can help you:
- Wake up in front of your parents and calmly do artificial vomiting. Put them on the toilet and pretend to vomit. If the parents don’t wake up, go to them and tell them what just happened.
- Say you have diarrhea. Remember to spend a long time in the toilet, often flush the water and use a freshener to hide the smell that is not really there. You can also try to make artificial diarrhea.
- If you are a girl, you can pretend to have pains and cramps associated with menstruation. It only works if you have started your period. If you are younger, they will not believe you and your mother will certainly suspect something. Your dad probably won’t want to talk about it, but your mum will understand you. In this case, no one will be able to accuse you of lying.
- Start crying. Parents will think this is a really serious problem. They may, however, take into account the fact that you pretend.
- If you are pretending to be flu or cold, stretch your lips wide to make them look chapped. Also, start gently twisting your nose so that it is red.
8. Protest if your parents want to leave you at home.
Under no circumstances should you shrug your shoulders and disagree with their decision immediately if they offer you a stay at home. Protest, but only if the beginning of the pretend wasn’t very convincing. This will only strengthen them in the belief that you really are sick. Say: “Mom, but I have a lot of work today” or “but I have a math test today.”
However, do not overdo it. If your parents know you don’t care about testing, think of something else. Say you have a favorite class or circle you really want to go to. If you protest, parents will be convinced that you really care about going to school. However, you must be careful, because the plan may turn against you. You can also quickly go to the toilet and feign vomiting.9
9. Show signs of improvement in your health.
If you stayed at home, lie down for a moment and then gradually show that you are feeling better. Some parents may want to check if you are not pretending, they will return home 10 minutes after leaving it on the pretext that they have forgotten something. You’d better stay in bed for at least 15 minutes. If you have too caring parents, show better health the next day. Otherwise, you will have to go to the doctor and all fraud will be issued.10
10. Under no circumstances should you agree to see a doctor.
If this happens, you must use the emergency exit. If you think your parents want to fail you for a doctor’s appointment, start gradually withdrawing from your illness. If the parents stay at home, go to your room and pretend to be asleep. Make sure, however, that you do it correctly, parents will check you.
If your parents left for work, they’ll definitely call you. Answer the phone only after three rings and try to speak as if you were tired. When they ask how you feel, remove one or two symptoms of the disease, for example: “My stomach has stopped hurting and my headache is a little smaller.” Thanks to this, they will rethink the need to see a doctor. If your parents get home earlier, make sure you look a little better than in the morning.
Tell me you feel better and you can go to school tomorrow. There is also another way out. If you start pretending to be difficult to detect, you can also get a doctor for them. So suggest diseases that are difficult to detect, such as diarrhea. You can also tell your parents that the day before you talked to the school hygienist who told you to stay at home because it is contagious.
11. You can pretend dizziness or weakness.
This will only work if you are sure that your parents will start measuring your blood pressure. After waking up, do the following:
- Lie on the floor and start doing crunches or other exercises, try not to breathe as long as you can.
- If the parents are in the same room, place one hand on the forehead and hold the other with something. Stop in a place as if you are not feeling well.
- If your parents want to measure your blood pressure, hold your breath for as long as possible during the measurement. It has been proven that properly performed this task can effectively reduce pressure.
12. However, if your parents send you to school, use this method:
- Eat a very small breakfast, but pack snacks in your backpack.
- During the day, go to the school nurse and say that you feel dizzy.
- When measuring blood pressure, hold your breath.
- Call your parents to come to you.
* If your parents don’t fool you in any of these ways, call them when you are at school. You’ll be more convincing if you go to school first and then find that you can’t survive the whole day. It’s a good way to avoid any test. However, you must remember that the medical school staff is harder to cheat. However, there are no tests that could detect if you have a headache or stomachache.
* The best way to fool a school nurse is to go to her office one and a half or two hours after starting classes. Say you are feeling unwell and ask if you could just rest with her for a moment. Return to class. After some time, go to the hygienist again and say that you are sick and you can’t focus. It will certainly work. You will be allowed to go home and you may be able to take time off the next day.
* A good way to do artificial vomiting is to pre-chew the cereal and spit it into the toilet. Pour a little orange or apple juice into it. You can also spit out chewed oatmeal. Another way is to add food coloring to the bread/water mixture.